I just completed my Somatic Experiencing Advanced Level Training with the incredible teacher Efu Nyaki, and my heart is overflowing with gratitude. Efu is not just a teacher—she is a true model of presence, love, compassion, humor, depth, and authentic being.

Watching Efu, learning from her, absorbing her way of being, I was reminded again of that healing is possible. There is hope. Connection is real. Life can run through us again.

Since forever there has been a longing in me. A longing not for “ready made and served” answers, not for someone to lead me, but for a presence that resonates so deeply that something in me remembers itself. A guide—not in the sense of authority, but in the sense of attunement. Someone who holds a space so vast, so real, so unwavering, that I can begin to trust my own knowing.

I deeply connect with the Sufi understanding of a teacher. The guide/teacher, the Murshid, is not someone who simply gives knowledge but someone who embodies it. They are not an authority to submit to, but a mirror, a presence, a tuning fork—helping us find our own resonance with truth. Another teacher of mine (also newly brought into my life) Kabir Helminski describes the true teacher as a living transmission, someone who awakens something already present within us.

“(…)teacher is like a lantern that helps to illumine our own way, rather than someone to whom we give away our own autonomy.”

I see this in Efu who does not just teach Somatic Experiencing—she is Somatic Experiencing – she is regulation, flow, attunement, and warmth. Being in her presence, all in the group we felt how much wisdom can be absorbed through the body, not just the mind. This is not learning; this is osmosis.

The body holds truth deeper than the thinking mind. Trauma is not just in the past; it is in the nervous system, in the patterns of contraction and release, in the breath, in the heartbeat, in the ways we brace or surrender to life. Healing does not come from forcing, from trying to understand or fix—it comes from attunement, from allowing, from reconnecting to the flow of life that was never truly lost, only held back.

There is immense gratitude for that guidance through presence, not force. Guides who do not impose answers; they hold space for what is already there to emerge. They help us reorganize from within, find safety in the body, and allow life to flow again. Healing is not about control; it is about trusting the organic process of unwinding and returning to wholeness. Holiness (if you may 🙂).

And just like in Sufism, the ultimate role of the teacher is to “disappear”. They do not place themselves between us and truth. They do not seek to be followed. Instead, they hold a space so true, so unwavering, that we begin to trust our own knowing.

“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”

— Rumi

This is what true guidance is to me. It is not about being given answers but about being met so fully that the answers emerge from within. It is presence. It is attunement. It is a holding so generous that it allows the other to become.

I have longed for this kind of presence, not just as a student but as a human being. To be met. To be seen, not just in my struggles but in my wholeness. To be held, not with force but with the kind of generosity that asks for nothing in return, expert of me becoming fully myself and coming of age as an adult. And I am reminded, again and again, that the greatest teachers do not give us something we do not have. They remind us of what we already are.

For this, I feel deep gratitude. To my teachers, for embodying this path with such authenticity and grace. To all those who teach not through control but through presence. To my colleagues and fellow students with whom I can experience, metabolise, go into pieces and into liquid state just to reemerge in new (even more beautiful) shape. To the longing itself, which continues to shape the journey.

And most of all, to the knowing heart—opening and growing stronger within me—that the guide is never truly outside of us. The presence I seek has been here all along, waiting to be recognized.

Loving you form here